Counting crows

posted by Mary Lello, Monday, April 20, 2009, 6:08 AM

This is going to be one of the hardest posts to write yet. I'm not even sure where to begin but I have vowed to keep you all in the loop and so I need to give you the most recent update.

Yesterday Jim fell down the stairs from our bedroom to the living room. These stairs are steep and narrow. He was actually heading towards the bathroom but slipped and lurched towards the top of the stairs. And this scene keeps replaying over and over in my mind like a horror movie. As he grabbed for the bannister at the top of the stairs he spun around and slid down the entire flight on his back, smashing head first into the wall at the landing at the bottom. All I could do was scream NOOoooooo! I could see blood and had to move him off the landing to see where that blood was coming from. My old EMT training told me not to move him but he was conscious and not bleeding from the nose or ears and I HAD to see what bleeding. I pulled him off the landing, grabbed towels to stop the bleeding on his head, called 911 and then called Todd.

Todd arrived within minutes ... maybe it was seconds! I think he might have a firemans pole set up in his house with shoes, pants, shirt all set up so he slides down the pole and straight into his clothes and then he's out the door! The ambulance was here at about the same time. I was amazed actually at how quickly they arrived. They stabilized Jim on a stretcher and loaded him into the truck. Todd and I followed in my car and the rest of the day was spent in ER.

This man Jim Daniels, my God, what is he made of? He broke no bones. A CAT scan showed no internal bleeding in the skull or the entire spine. Remember, he's now on blood thinners so this is a real worry. However, on Friday Weisburg made the decision to keep him off coumadin so he is on Tinzaparin which seems to be far better and safer for a any kind of accident .... like a fall down the stairs with the head smash at the end! He is pretty beat up with some great road rash on his arm. I told him we should tell all our cycling friends that he got going really fast on that wind trainer and had a fantastic crash! But guess I've blown that story with this post.

We now have the day bed set up again in the living room. My family showed up in the ER yesterday and whipped into action to track down the bed again and get it set up in the house for us. Wonderful. Thank you! He slept there last night and I slept on the couch right near by. Well, not sure how much I slept really, but this is where I laid my head. Every time I lie down and close my eyes my damn mind hits the replay button and I see this horrible fall with the head smash at the end over and over. And I just start to cry, every time, even now as I write this. It was terrifying and horrible and, of course, I feel so responsible even though I KNOW I'm not. But damn .... it was my watch.

I've been reading the book Suburban Safari by our friend Hannah Holmes. In this book she studies the ecosystem of the American backyard, with her own yard as her study plot. I have just finished reading the section on crows, how they form families and build 'sink sized nests' and have individual personalities. I've started to notice that we have a family here in our 'hood and wondering if we might have a nest around too. Yesterday when we got home I lied down on the couch in front of our windows that look out over the ocean for a much needed nap while Jim slept too. As I woke from this nap I lied there from my flat-on-my-back position on the couch starring up into the huge White Pine tree that towers over my neighbors house. I did not know where I was going to find the strength to move again, nor could I fathom all that lay ahead of me now, again. And then I saw a crow fly into the tree and disappear briefly, only to fly out again. Within minutes another crow, or the same one perhaps, flew into the same spot and then after only seconds flew out again. A nest? I sat up, A NEST!!! And I got excited to think of getting out my binoculars and inspecting this closer in the morning light. And from this family of crows I found that I could still move and was able to get off that couch and get Jim some dinner.

And this morning, I'm watching crows out the front window. Life goes on, in all it's drama and all around us, life goes on.

So shall ours.

Loving you all back,

Mary